AVP: Aristocrat vs. Patrician

Thursday, September 30, 2004
Coming soon to a voting booth near you...

Jet, Meet Wall

"Wall, jet."

An F4 Phantom Jet becomes acquainted with a thick concrete wall built to withstand a nuclear explosion. Watch their spectacular meeting here.

(No pilots were harmed in the making of this film.)

Butt Boobs

Misinterpreting the cleavage:

(Crescent Moon courtesy SondraK)

Oompa Loompa Doopity Doo...

Wednesday, September 29, 2004
Is it just Lynne-baby or do all of us think that John Kerry looks like an Oompa Loompa?


You do the math.


Further evidence that John Kerry escaped from Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory...



I rest my case.


Palestinian Child Abuse

Brave resistance murders two children!

(Murdering scum)

See also:
Palestinian Child Abuse: The Slide-Show

Cyborg Kerry

Tuesday, September 28, 2004
Domo arigato, Mr. Roboto.

Democratic presidential candidate Sen. John Kerry, D-Mass., says the pledge of allegience at a town meeting at the River Valley Middle School in Spring Green, Wisc., Monday, Sept. 27, 2004. (AP Photo/Gerald Herbert)

(Anyone Got Some Bicycle Grease? courtesy SondraK)

Oh, the Humanity!

A grisly photo illustrates the devastation caused by a recent storm in Sweden.

(WARNING: Disturbing image)

Mecca Roadsigns

Monday, September 27, 2004

This Just In...

Sunday, September 26, 2004
Not only does Kerry make better Jello, but nine year olds can read.

Go figure. Man, it just makes me hate snot-nosed nine year olds with corrupt parents who force their views on their children at such a young age even more than I already do.

Also, welcome me. I will be posting nice little snippets like this every now and then.

SOTU Remix

The State of the Union Address, after a good deal of splicing. Watch it and weep. (Warning: requires strong bladder control.)

Another remix.

Bush addresses the nation:

Bin Laden Found!

Link to 7-11 confirmed!

See also:
'Osama bin Laden' robs convenience store

Foaming at the Mouth

Saturday, September 25, 2004
Another angry, rabid fanatic of the religious right.

(Mined from the Archives)

See also:
Abortion T-shirts

A fetus at 6-7 weeks. As you can see, it's just a lifeless clump of cells.

From the BBC: 8 week-old clump of cells seen stretching its leg in the womb. Yup, and that thing's not a human life...

(Either the fetus is stretching its legs, or that's one killer erection.)

At eight weeks gestation, this foetus is able to kick and straighten his legs, turn them round and move his arms up and down.

"I Like That Dictator"

A couple of fringe leftists admit their true feelings about despots.
(Warning: Contains graphic footage)

SEE ALSO: (for the sake of fairness and balance)
In His Own Words

Chatter Box

An American inventor has come up with the ingenious but somewhat creepy idea of installing video screens in tomb stones, thereby allowing mourners to replay fond memories of a dead relative, watch recorded video diaries from the deceased, or perhaps resolve some unfinished business with that bastard brother-in-law.

However, I'm a bit uneasy about resurrecting the dead in the form of a computer monitor; because, as lovely as it would be to enjoy the virtual presence of a dead person, I can't say I'm entirely comfortable with the notion of turning graveyards into high-tech media centers and tombstones into macabre jukeboxes.

Besides, one of the advantages of death is that it finally forces people to lie down and shut up.

See also:
Web site offers after-death e-mail

Penguin Pranks


Crap Woman

Friday, September 24, 2004

See also:
All Things Crap

Islamist Vogue

The Islamo-fascists have published a new online magazine for women, al-Khansa, which advises female Islamists about how to support their jihadist husbands and involve their children in martyrdom activities. As the magazine puts it, "The blood of our husbands and the body parts of our children are our sacrificial offering."

Not exactly Cosmopolitan material, but I suppose it's a start...

(The Latest in Burqa Trends courtesy SondraK)

See also:
Actual al-Qaeda Flash Presentation
Taliban Singles Online Dating
72 Virgins Escort Service
Osama is a Bad Father

Running Mates

Thursday, September 23, 2004
"My little Edwards likes when I slap him, doesn't he?"

Adolf, He's So Hot Right Now

Satisfied Customer

Mein Khakis

Liberal Media? What Liberal Media?

The Jesse Factor has a devastating expose of the BS-spewing Ben Barnes -- an active fund raiser for the Kerry campaign and a former lieutenant governor of Texas, who CBS Information Minister Dan Rather regarded as a credible source on Bush's National Guard record.

Barnes has claimed amid much CBS fanfare that he pulled government strings and peddled influence in order to land Bush a place in the National Guard.

But never mind that:

*Bush entered the National Guard in 1968, while Barnes became lieutenant governor in 1969;

*in 2000, Barnes said in sworn testimony -- under oath -- that he had NOT helped Bush enter the National Guard;

*Barnes's own daughter has dismissed the charges as a political ploy, calling her father's claims "lies";

*Barnes is the Kerry campaign's third most generous benefactor, having raised a quarter of a million dollars.

The media rejects the 265 Swift Boat Veterans for Truth because one of their benefactors knows Karl Rove; but the media is willing to accept the anti-Bush fantasy tales of a high-profile liberal operative, and has no qualms about putting a lying tabloid smear-artist, Kitty Kelley, on the Today Show three mornings in a row.

And there is no liberal media.

Epileptic Fun

Introducing the Killer Japanese Seizure Robots:

I Love Abortion

The perfect t-shirt for your toddler:

'I Love Abortion' Infant T-Shirts

(Enlarged Version)

(Irony courtesy SondraK)

See also:
Child Pimp & Ho Halloween Costumes

I think it's worth noting that the above t-shirt is a joke. Repeat: a joke.

This, however, is unfortunately not a joke:

'I Had an Abortion T-Shirt

Kerry's Favorite

Wednesday, September 22, 2004
"Hey, leggo of my Lesbo!"


Man arrested for "mowing" under the influence.

(With charming mug-shot)

Blind Hawk

President Bush seems to be living fantastical world detached from reality. Don't get me wrong, I like Bush and believe that he is ultimately a better choice than the reanimated cadaver that is John Kerry. But for once, I wish Bush would put aside his canards and blithe assurances and speak honestly about the deterioration of Iraq.

Over the past few weeks -- as the insurgency has grown in strength, as the violence has intensified and proliferated -- President Bush has refused to acknowledge the spiralling chaos and has resorted to repeating the empty platitudes and rhetorical punch-lines that have become a staple of his presidency.

"Democracy is on the march," he declares. Oh really? Then why are American troops fighting daily battles against roving guerillas in the streets of Baghdad? Why have large swathes of Iraq been relinquished to the control of Islamists and various terror gangs? Why do we hear of new beheadings and kidnappings virtually every day? Why are the Iraqi people overwhelming opposed to the U.S. occupation? Why are Iraqi police and military forces deserting the government in droves? Why are the interim authorities increasingly impotent and helpless in the face of the terrorist onslaught? And why are al-Sadr and Zarqawi still at large?

President Bush's rosy picture of "democracy on the march" simply contradicts the dismal reality on the ground -- the reality that we are losing. If Bush were a genuine "war president", as he has labelled himself, then he would be willing to admit his mistakes and to face our grim predicament with the same clarity and unflinching resolve that he has shown in confronting the terrorists.

But instead of fessing-up to the truth and assuming responsibility, Bush has shirked that responsibility and has tried to hide his incompetence behind a smoke-screen of bravado. And that, my friends, is the mark of a fantasist.

Teenage Hitler

Tuesday, September 21, 2004
Even as a young boy, Adolf knew he wanted to be a dictator.


CBS's last line of defense...

(Forged Climax courtesy SondraK)

Pillow Fight

Sensitive weaponry for a "sensitive" war:

('Soft Power' courtesy SondraK, via Communists For Kerry)

Starring Bruce Lee as Goalie

From the makers of Ninja Ping Pong comes an epic Eastern thriller: Kung Fu Soccer.

See also:
The Actual Movie: Shaolin Soccer

He Never Heard It Coming

Blind man kills deaf man

A, B, C, D...

Sunday, September 19, 2004
The intriguing mystery of Britney Spears' fluctuating cup size...

See also:
Britney's Cellulite Problem
Britney's Ugly
Britney's Butt Crack
Britney's Ball-Fondling
Britney's Nipple

Saddam Springer

If Saddam Hussein had chosen a career in show business rather than in Baathism...

Bush Disembarks from Wagon

Thursday, September 16, 2004
1991: Bush gets smashed at a wedding party, goes on a drunken rant for the camera. Hilarious and deeply disturbing at the same time.

Pleasure Boat Captains for Truth


Slap the Secretary

Tuesday, September 14, 2004
Just start typing and let the workplace sexual harassment begin!

(Warning: May be offensive to Gloria Steinem and her feminist minions.)

I Have Many Long Snakes

Monday, September 13, 2004
Are those 19 pythons in your vest, or are you just happy to see me?

Python-eating-wallaby pics for the occasion:

We've Been Punk'd!

Sunday, September 12, 2004
It turns out the big mushroom cloud over North Korea wasn't a nuclear explosion after all...

(I smell bullshit.)

No Biggie

Yet more pointless fun with Tiananmen:

Where's Waldo?

Saddam's New Career...

...Serving chicken wings at Hooters.

(May I Take Your Order coutesy Worth1000.com)

Bean Bag

That's one freakishly large nutsack...

Raputin's Foot-long Pickled Schlong


Saturday, September 11, 2004
UPDATE: It's a trick!

In case you hadn't already marked the date on your calendars, Thursday was the 56th anniversary of the glorious founding of the People's Gulag of North Korea. And according to reports filtering out of its evil capitalist neighbor, South Korea, the Norks celebrated the auspicious occasion by setting off a nuclear bomb.

The reports say that last week, a large mushroom cloud appeared over North Korea -- so large, in fact, that the crater was spotted by satellites.

It's not clear whether the explosion was actually the result of an atomic test, but I'm betting it was. The New York Times reported today that U.S. intelligence had detected signs that North Korea was preparing to put on a radioactive fireworks display; and for once, it looks like our intelligence turned out to be true.

Now that the benevelont People's Utopia has the Bomb, I wonder what it intends to do with this newfound capability. Maybe this poster provides a clue...

For those of you tempted to blame this mess on Bush: Note that while Madeleine Albright was merrily sipping champagne with Kim Jong-Il, his scientists were secretly cooking up uranium.

"Albright, you are one hot babe. Come back to my room and I'll let you inspect my ballistic missile"

"Oh, Mr. Jong, you make me blush..."

Gogigyeopbbang With Fries
Let Them Eat Efficacious Pine Needles!

Three Years On...

Never Forget


Serious medical malpractice...

(Doggie Treats courtesy SondraK)

Bumper Stickers

Thursday, September 09, 2004
(Another installment in the "Bi-partisan Gibe" series.)

Stay Mounted

Lurch/Little Boy '04

Aryan Beverage

Wednesday, September 08, 2004
Milk: The Healthy Choice for a Growing Aryan

Turn Left

More random fun with Tiananmen.

See also:
Where's Waldo?


The Pullitzer Prize Winning journalist who took this picture in Sudan years ago committed suicide in 1999. Having witnessed such real-life nightmares, I don't blame him.

How Subtle

The Leftist bottom-feeders have shown once again that there is no depth to which they will not sink in their crude and ugly campaign to demonize the President.

Do these lunatics really believe that George Bush is so evil that he's capable of eating children? I bet.

(Not Exactly Nuanced courtesy SondraK)

Conscientious Objector

Tuesday, September 07, 2004
Yuck. Yuck Yuck Yuck.

As a conservative, it pains me to see a fellow conservative spouting vile, hate-filled vitriol about a former President. It is especially dismaying to see this kind of horrid rhetoric emanating from an intelligent conservative who I sincerely consider a friend.

"I hope you f****** die"? Wow. I understand that raging obscenity is a part of your "schtick"; and I must say, your wild offensiveness is usually hilarious. But wishing for the death of an American president crosses the line.

Whatever your opinion of Bill Clinton -- and I, for one, happen to regard him as one of the first genuine conservative presidents: a man who cut taxes, revamped welfare, shrunk the federal workforce, balanced the budget and maintained a strong economy -- he and his family are entitled to nothing less than our absolute sympathy.

If you aren't willing to put aside your partisanship for one moment and accord President Clinton the same basic respect and dignity that any person deserves in a time of dire health, then, to put it bluntly, you are just as heartless and cold-blooded as the unhinged Leftist hatemongers who villainize President Bush and write fantasy novels about his assassination.

So for once -- and this appeal is addressed to all conservatives who have used Clinton's health crisis to engage in mean-spirited attacks -- can we please show a little civility and decency in our treatment of fellow Americans, and especially former Presidents, who just happen to be Democrats?

Mud-slinging tarnishes the reputation of all conservatives and lowers us to the same primitive level of the frothing cretins on the Democratic fringe. Thus, for the sake of your fellow Republicans, please refrain from vicious personal attacks on a distinguished American politician.

It just isn't kosher.

Democrits: The Redux

Monday, September 06, 2004
The hypocrisy of liberals reached a staggering height today with the publication of a new and even more shameless Bush-bashing book, which claims, among other absurd things, that President Bush harbored a long-running cocaine addiction and that Laura Bush smoked pot in her youth. (Not that she inhaled, of course.)

Recall that the Kerry campaign has sued the Swift Boat Veterans for alleged libel, and has demanded that their #1 best-selling book, Unfit for Command, be withdrawn from bookstores.

Apparently, in the warped la-la land that liberals inhabit, it is perfectly acceptable to accuse the President of being a former coke-head, but it is downright slanderous -- slanderous! -- for a group of 250 Vietnam veterans to even dare to criticize the hyped, much-touted war record of a Democratic presidential candidate.

Please, give me a break. If you liberals want to attack the President for supposedly snorting cocaine, then go ahead -- that's your First Amendment right. But don't you dare run crying to the courts when those meany-weeny conservatives decide to strike back with a few well-aimed "blasphemous charges" of their own.

In other words, quit whining, you pretentious babies!

See also:
Democrits: The Original
Pleasure Boat Captains for Truth
Medal Enlargement

Kerry's Constituency (II)

As a general rule of thumb, I will support any presidential candidate who this man, a leading Islamic terrorist, opposes.

(BTW, what the heck is that sock thingy on his head?)

And take a wild guess who Mr. Sock-Head favors as the next President of the United States... Yup, you got it: he's rooting for the botoxed mongoloid.

Wow, Kerry must feel so flattered to have been endorsed by a prominent Islamo-fascist. His campaign is really on a roll!

But seriously, is it even questionable which candidate the terrorists would prefer to see in the White House?

Let's compare the two contenders and their view on terrorism.

President Bush has made it clear that he is dead serious about waging the War on Terror, and bringing the Islamist goons to justice. Kerry, on the other hand, has seemed more concerned about kissing up to Jacques Chirac and making friends with the U.N. than he has about eradicating al-Qaeda.

Of course, the difference in priority is not lost on the terrorists, who understand that a vote for Kerry is a vote for a more "sensitive" America.

See also:
Lt. Kerry's Foreign Leader Fan Club Band